Thankful...

Twas the night before Thanksgiving and I am prepping food for tomorrow's gathering of our little family. In a year that was as hard as this last year, one could potentially ask themselves what there is to be thankful for. Each of us has shining stars in our lives and at the darkest of times these things shine brighter. Whether it be family, friends, safety, health. Sometimes we take for granted that we have been blessed and look towards belongings and money as the things that truly bless us. Being unemployed in an unforgiving economy and losing what savings was saved puts things in perspective once solid ground is once again gained.

I often think back, when I am having a bad day, to more care free times and cherish that I experienced them. When a job was 5 hours a night at a community movie theatre and between selling tickets time was shared in conversation with friends who were co-workers. When minimum wage increasing to $4 an hour was something to get really excited about, a credit card with a $500 limit was huge and dinner was a small chicken fried rice from the take-away chinese restaurant two doors down in the same plaza. When you went home at the end of the day and saw your parents, who you still lived with. Back then you never think to the time when they will be gone and once that time comes and you find yourself a little more alone in the world you wish you could go back and appreciate those moments more. Parents who may have been strict to some degree but always seemed to cut you slack when you needed it. Parents who were right there and not across the country, so far away. When people in your life lived for you to get out of work so your evening could begin at the coffee house at 11pm. When you slept only a few hours a night in order to fit it all in.

Today we all tend to get so caught up in the 'I need to do's' and the 'I really wish's' and the 'wouldn't it be easier's' that we lose perspective of what needs really are. You need your family, some sort of roof over your head and food on the table. The next improved iPod or sweetest looking handbag or new-fangled camera aren't things that will end our existence if we live without them. Yeah, they are great and when I was at my job that ended a year ago, of which I was employed for almost ten years I never thought twice about dropping some coin and I admit that I lived more on 'wants' than 'needs', taking for granted that the needs would always be taken care of and that the wants would always be satisfied. Why wouldn't they? It has always been this way... until this year.

It's been a hard year, hell it's been a hard year and a half since losing Dad. But jobs come and they go. It's the people in your lives and the places you have seen and the things you have experienced that make you the strongest you will be and give you hope. Sure, I would give my right arm to go to Burberry tomorrow and get a new bag... it's the 'handbag whore' in me, but it's not what defines me. It's not what I am thankful for.

This year I am thankful not only for all of the wonderful friends and family and co-workers in my life, but I am also extremely thankful that I can pay my house note on time every month and that we are still in the utility companies good graces after my job loss. I am thankful a small international company took a chance on me, my (finally finished) education and experience in my new career in a totally new industry for me.

I am thankful for the beautiful 13 year old in my life who still tells me she loves me in public and who Facebook's me when she is online. I am thankful for the woman she is becoming and am thankful that she and I can spend all day hanging out without her being bored. I am thankful she always knows what she will be ordering at Starbucks and that she appreciates a mani/pedi once in a while when we want to go out and feel all girly. I am also SO very thankful she has learned to love to read. Something we often do together while waiting for Adam to come home from work on Saturday afternoons. I am thankful she is loving and strong and has faith and confidence in herself. I am especially thankful and grateful that I have gotten to spend the past 10 years of her life with her.

I am thankful for all the paws that run across my floors all day and for the snuggly noses at night. Who needs blankets with 6 dogs on the bed I ask??

I am thankful for my husband who is strong when I am not and that we balance each other out. We promised each other long ago to never have the crazies at the same time and so far, 12 years later, it's worked. I am thankful that he is dedicated to his family and will move mountains for them, that he is a fantastic Father and that he says he loves me more with each passing day.

I am thankful for having grown up with my Dad, whom I miss every day. I am also thankful he painted a lot and that his works are in my home, which in its own way is like visiting with him each day.

I am thankful for my Mom, even though she lives in Oregon now and I am not allowed to call her before noon Atlanta time.

I am, like Topol, thankful the sun always rises after it has set, albeit hours later. I am also lately very thankful for Swedish Fish and my Gluten Free iPhone app, but that's probably another story.

So it is with this that I give thanks for the year while remembering that Thanksgiving should be every day throughout the year. For I am thankful then as I am now. Happy Thanksgiving friends!

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Journey through these eyes of mine

While sipping on a cup of time

Once a girl I now grow old

So now my story must be told

A warrior of days gone past

I knew those days weren’t meant to last

A waged war of thoughts and words

A lifetime to look forward towards

I held that banner oh so high

From morning light

Through midnight sky

Relishing freedom still challenged by some

I feel my battle is yet to be won

This strength and passion will never die

So I pass to you this cup of mine